Last night in Nor Cal

Storage company, check.

Movers, check.

4,000 other items on our to-do list, check, check, check.

Thankfully, we have friends that we have been lucky enough to make in this new city (we’ve only been in San Jose for a year) and will miss dearly who have supported us through these last few days. And we paid them in meat. Frozen meat. And beer. Whatever we had to give.

I’m sick to my stomach that this is all happening. Not that we have to pick up and move. For this, the ability to afford such a last-minute endeavor, to go to the hospital that we believe can give Kai the best shot, for this, I’m extremely grateful. Thank you, thank you, thank you, to every kind human to gave to the go-fund-me. The weight lifted off our shoulders with that support is undeniable.

I’m sick because all of this means my baby is going to go through something that no one should ever have to go through. I know we are not alone. I’m sure I will be blown away by his grace and resilience. I have to hope this is the case. And I’m also so scared. I am very scared. all the time.

The last week and a half have been a total blur. I’ve been soaking up all the moments, in between coordinating a million little things.

Kai is getting stronger every day. He is a little warrior, that is for sure. I’m his source of all and now add PT to the list.

Cruz is excited about the move, although he still doesn’t fully get it, I love his sense of adventure. He keeps saying our house is old and so we need a new one. I LOVE this kid’s spirit.

Chasen and I are holding onto each other for dear life. We are constantly making decisions and every so often, when we don’t have to, those are blissful moments.

We have two houses we are looking at in Memphis. Hoping one of them works out. Once we have an address, we can call on our things to start their journey to us. Then, the unpacking. I’ll tell you, we have too much stuff. Way too much.

I don’t want stuff. I want memories. I want my babies to laugh and play. I want us all to be healthy and strong.

We fly out at 8 am tomorrow. Which means an early start to the day. An Uber ride with two car seats and a hundred suitcases (lol). A layover in Denver.

When we arrive in Memphis (please weather and planes be on our side), we split up. Chasen with Cruz and our hundred suitcases to pile into a rental car and head to an Airbnb, home for a while… Kai and I on a St. Jude shuttle to start registration, COVID tests, and all the other things. Then we will be able to get back to our loves.

Thursday and Friday, we have full days in the hospital. Friday, Kai will be under sedation most of the day getting another round of tests to ensure he is still M0 before we start treatment on Monday.

Please keep us in your thoughts and know I am sending love into the universe for all of our friends and family, strangers, folks who have reached out to say they will help guide us when we arrive, just thank you to you all and we love you so much!

The De Leon’s. xx